Six months ago today, I finally saw that second line I’d been chasing for three years.
Six months ago today, I was scared and excited and had no idea how hard and far I could possibly fall.
I fell, though.
Into love.
Into hopefulness.
Into joy.
And then, nine weeks later, I fell into a hellish reality that included a life without my Gummy Bear.
A life of grief.
I fell again.
Into sadness.
Into hopelessness.
Into despair.
I’ve picked myself up since then, dusted myself off a bit and attempted to move on, but every day is still a struggle to remember, and a struggle to forget.
Six months ago I found my world, but it would be lost.
Six months ago I was a different person than I am today.
Where will I be in another six months?
Who will I be?
There’s no way to know for sure.
All I can do is crawl from one day to the next, trying to make my way to the other side of the sun.
Stars :: Grace Potter and the Nocturnals
I lit a fire with the love you left behind
And it burned wild and crept up the mountain side
I followed your ashes into outer space
I can’t look out the window, I can’t look at this place.
I can’t look at the stars
They make me wonder where you are
Stars, up on heaven’s boulevard
And if I know you at all, I know you’ve gone too far
So I, I can’t look at the stars.
All those times we looked up at the sky
Looking out so far, it felt like we could fly.
And now I’m all alone in the dark of night
And the moon is shining, but I can’t see the light.
And I can’t look at the stars
They make me wonder where you are
Stars, up on heaven’s boulevard
And if I know you at all, I know you’ve gone too far
So I, I can’t look at the stars.
Stars, they make me wonder where you are
Stars, up on heaven’s boulevard
And if I know you at all, I know you’ve gone too far
So I can’t look at the stars.
Just Stop Trying and It Will Happen... 