Just Stop Trying and It Will Happen...

:: Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James ::

I know.  I can’t believe I got sucked into reading this series either.

I had just heard about it from so many people that I had to give it a shot… And knowing that there was a serious steam-factor helped too.

Hey, don’t judge!  Robot Sex is real, and a serious danger to the Sexy Time portion of a marriage – especially when TTC!

Okay, so the book.

First, I should say this:  I am a grammar and structure snob.  I’ve said it before, but this book and its sequels really brought that to light.  I was under the impression that all authors were professionals that retained the services of editors who wouldn’t dare let a manuscript out of their hands until it was grammatically perfect.

I was wrong about that.

Some authors start out their writing ideas online in a community with other aspiring writers, and go on to self-publish.  Even if they go through a small publishing house, the use of editors can be limited.  There’s absolutely nothing wrong with this path to authordom, however one should really do one’s homework before releasing something like this onto the masses.

Now I know.

E.L. James started this book in a similar community.  Actually, after having done a little research, it turns out that the author originally started this story as Twilight fan fiction, and then went on to change the names and story to a less vampire-and-werewolf-y tale.  Once you get a handle on the characters though, you can really see the influence shine through.

The author is also British, and writes about wholly American places and characters.  I’m pretty sure she learned everything she knows about Seattle from watching Grey’s Anatomy, too.  You will see some strange word placement and conversation throughout, and you can attribute that to the fact that authors should write about what – and where – they know.

The first book starts out with a clumsy, socially awkward new college graduate named Anastasia Steele, who stumbles into the office of a slightly older, smoldering hot millionaire CEO, Christian Grey.

Basically, he is enthralled for reasons unknown, and stalks and intimidates Ana until she agrees to have dinner with him.

Nice, huh?

Ana is inexperienced in many ways… I’ll let you just go ahead and guess how.

Anyway, Christian pursues Ana and after a few meetings rife with sexual tension as thick as pea soup, he reveals to her that he wants a relationship.

Only, not the kind you think.

Grey wants Ana to be his submissive.  And inexperienced, socially retarded Ana, goes back and forth with her Inner Goddess about the choice for chaaaaaaapters on end.

Don’t get me wrong, the story was hot, but hot damn!  I wanted to strangle that girl on SO many occasions.

Just bang the hot millionaire, mmkay?  Jeez!  Like it’s that hard!

(…that’s what she said.)

So the book goes on to chronicle the growing relationship between Christian and Ana, and the struggles (heh) they have trying to deal with his control issues and her not-liking-to-be-controlled and yet kinda-liking-to-be-tied-up issues.

The subsequent follow-ups, Fifty Shades Darker and Fifty Shades Freed, continue to play out the story of their relationship, and the drama that follows Christian from his dark past.  I will say that the second and third books have much more of a viable plot line than the first… and still lots of intense boom-boom.

Oh, and one more thing:

Ana cannot say vagina.  At first it’s kind of funny.  And then it’s all like, DUDE…. It’s just a vagina!  Get ON with it!

Sheesh.

And so, with all that being said, I enjoyed the story.

I also enjoyed the sex.

Both in the books, and in my real life due to the books.

Hot.  Hot.  Hot.

So hot, I tore through all three books in 10 days.

(The husband still maintains that these were the best 10 days of his life.)

I think better stories with more depth and heart have been written, however, and I will go onto review other books I’d recommend before these.

However, if you’re looking for some summer erotica fluff to read, and something to gossip about at the office water cooler, then give these books a shot!

What’s the worst that could happen?

Oh.  Well, yeah.  You could have a tragic BDSM accident and a very awkward encounter with the fire department as you try to explain to them how you zip-tied yourself to the bed posts waiting for your man to get home, and then remembered you left the oven on.

So, please.  Read and enjoy, but react with caution.  😉