Status

Unsolicited Reproductive System Update

Monday, July 9th, 2012.  CD23, 6DPO.

So, it’s been a while since I posted much of anything here about what my body is or is not doing.  Mostly I’ve just been posting about books and other things in life that have been distracting me from said concerns.

I have my reasons.

Primarily, it’s because I’m currently on a little bit of a TTC hiatus since I’m in between doctors and treatment cycles.

So I’m on a break.

But I’m kinda not.

I guess as cynical as this process has made me, I still have some modicum of hope somewhere deep inside that I might get pregnant naturally.  I keep thinking, “Wouldn’t it be hilarious if I got pregnant on vacation/on a break/completely by accident?” 

Yes.  Hilarious.

And effing awesome.

I would, of course, have to change the name of my blog, but it would be worth it in the end.

Anyway, while I haven’t been monitoring my body as carefully as usual, I have continued to take my temps somewhat faithfully.

The last time I took a break from meds, my cycle lasted over 50 days.  I really hope this cycle is different, and judging by my temps, it might be alright.  I have what looks like a pretty clear shift just under a week ago, and a few other TWW symptoms that are typical for me at this time in a normal cycle.

The only thing that I am iffy about is that I haven’t been taking the progesterone supplements.  I took them during the TWW in all of my previous IUI cycles just for extra insurance, and since I didn’t use OPKs or anything to time my ovulation, I didn’t realize I actually had ovulated until a few days after.

At this point, taking the supplements probably wouldn’t do much good.  My lining is either good, or it’s not.  The implantation period has all but passed.

I guess it’s not a big deal.  I need to let my body rest, and taking a TTC break really does mean a total break from peeing on things and popping pills.

I guess if I do end up with child after this, it will be even more special.

But, alas, the cynic in me takes over when I allow myself to have thoughts like that.

My inner-cynic really doubts that this is going to be a successful cycle, and I’m sure I’ll be front and center in the new RE’s office in a week, awaiting instructions on the next phase in my life of constant disappointment in my girl parts.

*le sigh*

I’m keeping my chin up and hoping for the best, but as always, I’m prepared for the worst.

 

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4 comments on “Unsolicited Reproductive System Update

  1. B
    July 9, 2012 at 11:15 am #

    I feel like I am in the exact same spot. I am on a “break” between cycles and trying completely naturally for the first time in half a year. I vacillate between hoping this will be my miracle and wanting to smack myself for having such outlandish thoughts. I am still waiting for my tww to begin, but I wish you lots of luck in yours!!

    Like

    • Tracy
      July 9, 2012 at 11:27 am #

      Don’t you just feel… “stagnant”? It sucks. Some days I wonder what keeps me going, you know?

      I could totally have this amazing life if I completely let go of the motherhood dream. My husband and I could travel, and not worry about socking away money for the looming threat of IVF. Hell, we could buy a small house and adopt a crapload of cats and be content!

      Except that I wouldn’t be content. I’m not there yet. Hopefully for us both, we don’t have to explore our what-if-motherhood-never-comes options! 😛

      Like

  2. Katie
    July 9, 2012 at 1:47 pm #

    I can’t imagine giving up the control of pee sticks galore, etc. how ironic of a blog title would that be though if it happened? Ahhhh!

    Like

    • Tracy
      July 9, 2012 at 1:53 pm #

      Well, I can promise you this: when I get back to medicated cycles, I will PEE ON ALL THE STICKS!!!!

      Also, I am extra control-freakish when I’m being monitored for some counter-intuitive reason, lol. I guess maybe there’s a little bit of INsanity in INfertility. 😉

      Like

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