Month: June 2012

Happy TWOsday!

Tuesday, June 12th, 2012.  CD23, 11DPO/10DPIUI.

Today’s a pretty good day.


Twin nephews!!  😀

Josh and Jace make Auntie Tracy an aunt six times over!

Someone told me at a party a couple weeks ago that holding a brand new baby on the day they are born is good luck in getting pregnant.

I hope that’s legit, because I’m gonna hold both of those little nuggets later today!

And, let’s be honest… I could really use some double-luck.  🙂



Sunny Days

Saturday, June 9th, 2012. CD20, 7DPIUI/8DPO.

Had my post-IUI ultrasound and blood work this morning. Things are typical of past cycles. Lining is 16.5, and progesterone is 28.9.

Nothing out of the ordinary… Nothing that hints at pregnancy.

Those numbers are not the highlight of my day, however.

First of all, I’m posting this from the pedicure chair, so that’s pretty awesome. Still not as cool as my plans for later…

Tonight I have an appointment for my tattoo consultation! I am so psyched about this.

I got my first tattoo when I was 18. It’s pretty much what an 18-year-old, fresh out of the house and off the leash, would get: a Chinese character.

Don’t judge. That was many years ago, and it was popular!

I don’t regret the tattoo in the least. It’s in a spot where no one will see it unless I show them (thank GOD it’s not a tramp-stamp!), and it symbolizes love, which is an enduring theme in my life. However, the love theme is more of a marker of what I was looking for, and where I was at that time.

It’s not that I’ve grown out of my love tattoo, it’s just that I am ready for something new to symbolize where I’ve been since then, and where I hope to be in the future.

I have some ideas for images, wording and placement, but I am leaving the design in the capable hands of a very talented tattoo artist that I have met through many (previously-inked) friends. I love her work, and I can’t wait to get started on this process!

Now I know that pursuit of this tattoo is fully dependent upon what the beta results say next Friday, but I like to plan for all outcomes. In a way, this tattoo is something that can keep me busy for a while if this last study cycle fails. If my cycle fails at the end of next week, I can be free to get started on this tattoo by the end of the month.

If this cycle is successful…? Well then I’ll wait at least nine months, LOL. I still feel like this tattoo would be relevant to my life. I have been through a lot of good times and bad times, and have tried to remain optimistic and hopeful through it all. I’ve journeyed a long way, and a long time. I’ve come far in my life, and I want to pay tribute to both how far I’ve come, and how far I have yet to go.

I can’t wait to show you all pictures. 🙂

Happy Saturday from sunny Michigan, friends!


I Would Die For That


Source: via Jamie on Pinterest


Good News for a Change

I got a call today from the new RE I am going to start seeing after the study concludes (which is in less than two weeks.  Oy.).  The administrator at the practice said that she’d been in touch with my insurance and wanted to go over with me what they’d cover.

Turns out, not only will they cover one complete IUI cycle including all of the monitoring and labs, but they will completely cover any and all diagnostics and treatments necessary to determine the cause of the infertility.  This would include, if necessary, laparoscopy and surgery to remove adhesions should they find that to be an issue.

So that’s good news!  Maybe my “unexplained” infertility will finally be explained!  And maybe with that explanation will come a resolution!

And by resolution, I mean a baby.  Obviously.

So anyway, I’m stuck at home today with an acute sinus infection and worrying about all the work I’m not able to accomplish right now, but at least I have a glimmer of hope.

And… maybe there’s even hope that I won’t have to use the benefits at all.  I guess we’ll all know in about ten days.



Floating Away

Monday, June 4th, 2012.  CD15, 2DPIUI.

I feel like crap.

I somehow contracted a lovely summer head cold, which is making my life miserable.  On top of that, this week is probably one of the Busiest Weeks In History at work, due primarily to the fact that I am covering for another recruiter while he is out of town.

It wouldn’t be such a big thing to take on his work in addition to mine, but I am also training four new minions for the team.  Thankfully, most of them seem to be getting the hang of things.

I really wish I could take some cold medicine, but the only stuff I can take makes me SOOOO sleepy.  I also don’t think I can take much during the TWW since the doctor told me to basically behave as though I’m pregnant until told otherwise.

And so, I’m miserable and whiny and stuffy, and my head feels like a balloon.  My ears hurt, and I have to be on the phone all day.  Waaah.

Perhaps I need to re-record my office voicemail:  “Hi.  This is Tracy.  I’b sick.  I hope you dob’t deed be for buch today, as I ab currently ibpersodating a bucus factory.  I’ll get back to you just as sood as I cad.”

Anyway, to recap the weekend:  I got my trigger shot at the clinic on Friday – the same day as my temperature took a nice little dip.  The doc seemed to think I may have ovulated one of my 3 mature follicles at that point, and she gave me the trigger to ensure that I released the rest ASAP.

The IUI was Saturday morning, and it went as usual.  The husband’s counts were pretty good:  39 million post-wash, with 98% motility!  Not too shabby!

My temp went up on Saturday morning, and up even more on Sunday, so FertilityFriend thinks I ovulated on Friday.  I really wasn’t expecting to have the IUI so soon, and thought we would have at least one more day to set aside some Sexy Time, but the rushed nature of this cycle caught me off guard.

Ugh.  Maybe the software is right…  Either way, our Sexy Timing wasn’t spectacular, as we didn’t get busy at all for a few days before the IUI.  We managed the day after the IUI, so hopefully between those two encounters, maybe we caught the 2 eggs that were lagging behind the first.

I’m just not feeling this cycle.  I feel like the timing has been off the whole month due to the increased meds, and that I progressed too quickly and caught the LH surge too late.  I also feel like this horrid cold is going to somehow hinder my fertility further.  I haven’t started testing out the trigger yet, and I’m not sure if I am even going to start this month.

I just feel so down about this whole process today.  I want this to work so I don’t have to move on to yet another new RE.  I want to be done giving blood and peeing on things and taking pills that make me sweat/cry/batshit crazy.

Ugh.  That seems to be the theme of today:  Ugh.

I hope you all are having a better day than this blogger!


Jumping the Gun

Friday, June 1st, 2012.  CD12.

Well today was interesting…

At my monitoring appointment, I was informed that the three measurable follicles I had on Wednesday were ready to burst today.  The doctor took my blood and promptly gave me my trigger injection, along with instructions to report back there tomorrow morning for the IUI.

Jeez!  I guess increasing the dosage of meds really made a difference!

So anyway, tomorrow it is, I guess.  I can’t help but feel a little nervous that this is too soon.  Especially since I’m getting the trigger 24 hours before the procedure.  I typically ovulate right around the 36 hour point after getting the HCG injection, so I hope this cycle moves a little faster to coincide nicely with the turkey basting.

Tomorrow should be a good day.  It’s the birthday of a dear friend of the husband’s and mine, it’s my half-birthday (what? you have one too!), and there’s a graduation party tomorrow afternoon that I’m excited to attend.

Oh, and if I can squeeze it in, I might be getting a consultation for the super-secret tattoo I want to get.  Squeeeeeeee!!

Soooo… yeah!  Excited about tomorrow, but nervous about the results in a couple weeks.  Same ol’ story.

Have a great weekend, friends!

(Here’s a Pin that made me giggle today:)

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hello, please advise

Summertime Sadness

A safe space where I discuss the racing thoughts in my head, personal struggles, and day-to-day activities while struggling with mental health and mood disorder issues. My personal goal is to reduce the stigma that comes with mental health and mood disorders, by talking more about it.