Month: January 2012

The Hopeful Guinea Pig

January 31st, 2012.  CD19.

This is gonna have to be quick, but I promise a full update later today or tomorrow for sure…

On my way home last Wednesday, I heard a radio ad recruiting for a research study of women trying to have babies.  There were no details, just a name and a phone number.  I was driving, and couldn’t take down the number, but I remembered the doc’s name (Diamond… girls’ best friend!), and Googled him when I got home…

Turns out, the research study is for unexplained infertility.  More specifically, rates of multiples with IUI using three different medications:  Clomid, Femara, and Menopur.

I called on Thursday morning, was put through a short screen, and was set up with an appointment and directions to have medical records sent over for previous treatments and procedures I’ve had done.

This has been a very quick, very unexpected thing.  It’s also a huge blessing, and will continue to be if after my initial testing, I am fully accepted into the study.

With the research, comes the study benefits:

Free medications (it’s a blind study, so I won’t know if I’m taking Clomid or Femara, but I will know if I take Menopur, since it’s an injectable).

Free monitoring, both blood testing and ultrasounds.

And up to four fully funded IUI cycles!

I am ecstatic about all of this, and nervous at the same time.  I’m mostly nervous about the commitment factor here… the research clinic is an hour and a half away, and they require a certain number of visits per cycle (up to eight, yikes!), and that means time away from work.  My boss and coworkers are totally on board, but it’s still a lot to handle.

I’m also nervous that I won’t be accepted for one reason or another… but I keep telling myself that if I am disqualified from a study on unexplained infertility, it will be because they figured out why I am having fertility issues.

Either way I win, right?

Anyway, the first visit is today, and I’m leaving shortly to start my adventure.  I can hardly wait to get this show on the road!

More updates later, I promise!

(If you’re the praying type, shoot a little word upwards for me, ‘kay?)



January 21st, 2012.  CD9.

I know, I know.

It’s been a minute, right?

I swear I haven’t been avoiding you, or this blog… I just needed a step back.  I also hoped I’d have some news for you when I returned…

I actually wrote a really long and thoughtful post last weekend… and then the interwebs ate it.  And then I got mad and went to bed.

But, I’m back now, and I have some updates.

First, I am not pregnant.  I know that sometimes when TTC bloggers disappear, people think it’s because they are withholding big news, but not so for this blogger.  I swear that if I have that type of news, you’ll be the second to know.  …I should probably tell my husband first.

I stopped the meds in November and let myself have a natural cycle.  Said natural cycle lasted 50 days, but Aunt Flo finally showed her ugly face.

In that 50 days, many amazing things happened…

I got a sweet promotion.  And a raise.  After only 4 months!

I gained the weight I’ve been working at for years, and have finally reached my goal weight of 120 pounds.

I found out the husband and I are going to be proud aunt and uncle to twin boys in June.

We are also going to be godparents to a sweet baby girl in May.

And honorary aunt and uncle to a miracle baby in September!

We’ve also decided to start looking for a house of our own.

The husband had a job interview with a major company that could come with a nice big pay increase and even better benefits.

Things are really coming together… And it’s been nice to have all of these distractions while waiting for baby to make three.

Medical bills are still out of control, and insurance isn’t covering nearly enough.  As tax season approaches, we may have to use our refund this year to pay for our first IUI.  (Incidentally, if the IRS gives us a baby girl, I am working on talking the husband into naming her Iris.  The jury’s still out.)

I plan to get in touch with Dr. Fran this month, and hopefully get this game plan rolling.  In the meantime, I have a lot of life to live.

I have renewed hope in this year.  I feel like the Mayans maybe thought the world would end in 2012 because maybe they foresaw my offspring entering the picture.  That’s gotta be it, right?

Oh crap.  Gotta go.  Coyote Ugly’s on.

(I’m gonna make a great parent one day, I swear.)



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A safe space where I discuss the racing thoughts in my head, personal struggles, and day-to-day activities while struggling with mental health and mood disorder issues. My personal goal is to reduce the stigma that comes with mental health and mood disorders, by talking more about it.