Day: July 11, 2011
Status

Falling Into Place

Ever heard this saying?

Yeah, that’s been my day today.

Downs, ups, more ups, more downs.  General craziness.  Stress, satisfaction, exhaustion, frustration.

Let me be less vague…

Dr. Fran is letting me move forward with this cycle as previously discussed:  Femara today through Saturday, CD13 ultrasound next Thursday, and an Ovidrel injection chilling nicely in my fridge.  No Rubella for me, thanks.

Ups!  Hooray!  I feel like this cycle is back on track, and therefore so is my journey to conception.

The nice landlady at the new place also called to let me know we’ve been approved to move in August 15th!  She will even let us come early if we want to do some painting!

More ups!  Woooo!!

I was driving to the pharmacy to pick up my Femara, pretty much on cloud nine after hearing all of that good news, when the nice landlady called me back.  She wanted to let me know that something worrisome came up when running a routine criminal background check for the husband and me.

…I’ll just say this:  If you don’t have a good credit/personal record monitoring service keeping tabs on your social security number, get one.  We just signed up for a service recently, but it’s so new I haven’t really had time to set it all up.

For that reason, I’ve been on the phone most of the afternoon trying to clear false criminal records in several states out of my husband’s name, and it looks like this is going to take some time.

But at least we have help.

I’m going to try to not let the frustration of receiving news like that bring me down.  The events of today have been wonderful thus far, and it’s been so nice having the past few days off to spend time with the husband.  We’ve had a relaxing and productive little summer vacation, and I’m trying to keep all that in mind.

Also, the new Harry Potter movie comes out this week, and I have to try not to pee my pants every time I see a preview on TV.

…What’s that you say?  Identity theft?  Obliviate!

For now, we will just move forward day to day.  The pieces of our lives will fall into place, little by little–with this cycle, with our move, and with the process of clearing the husband’s good name.

…Although clearly that won’t stop me from teasing him about being a crappy West Virginia pot dealer who gets caught all the time.  Hah.

Status

On Edge

July 11th, 2011.  CD3.

I am so unbelievably stressed out right now.  Thank the good Lord I’m not also at work and trying to deal with all of this…

Let me update you a bit:

On Friday, I got the call from Dr. Fran’s office letting me know that they recommend me getting re-immunized for Rubella.  The husband and I also drove out to the Toledo area to shop for a new place that day.

Things went well, and we found a nice place.  We took the lease application home with us with plans to fax it in Monday (today).

Saturday, AF arrived.  I was more under the weather than normal due to Flo’s late arrival, and the boss lady gave me the day off to recuperate.  I spent most of said day off researching the MMR vaccine.  I also found out that I had an adverse reaction to the vaccine in the past…  I tried to call Dr. Fran’s office to ask some questions, but everyone had gone home for the day.

Sunday, I spent the day pacing the floor, and generally worrying about things that couldn’t be dealt with until Monday.  I completed our lease application, and made myself sick with worry that we won’t get approved because of a nasty case of identity theft on my credit report that I’m still working to clear up after four years.  I also weighed the option of just forgoing the Rubella vaccine and starting the Femara cycle anyway, but the timing looked so tight that I didn’t know if it would even work.

Then I started stressing about how if I don’t start the Femara this cycle, the odds of my being able to start it next cycle are not good either, what with the timing of the move and all.

Then I ate all the ice cream in the freezer and went to bed.

…Which brings us to today.

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A safe space where I discuss the racing thoughts in my head, personal struggles, and day-to-day activities while struggling with mental health and mood disorder issues. My personal goal is to reduce the stigma that comes with mental health and mood disorders, by talking more about it.