June 25th, 2011.  CD24, 11DPO.

So, aside from feeling kinda PMS-y, giving in to the urge to eat every sweet and salty thing in sight, and this weird twinge-y feeling in my general pelvic area, I have reason to suspect that this cycle might give me reason to hope–more so than previous cycles have allowed…

Eleven days past ovulation is almost a record for me!  And I’m not even on any meds!  That’s got to mean something!

Maybe my reproductive system has been scared straight with all the “You better shape up, Uterus, before I take you to the RE!” threats I’ve been making.  Maybe my bite-my-fingernails-till-I-bleed, stress-inducing boss-lady being in Europe for a month was just enough time to coax my frightened little eggies out of hiding.  Maybe this is just the “right time” that everyone keeps talking about.

Maybe I “just stopped trying…” And, well, you know the rest.

Hah!  That would happen to me.  Can you imagine the irony?

Anyway, jokes aside, I could very well be expecting that raging bitch Flo any moment, but for now–for this moment–I’m choosing to remain positive.  I could be expecting something very different.

It could happen.

I could wake up tomorrow without a crime scene in my pants.  I could pee on a stick, wait three minutes, and have a good reason to wake my husband up early on a Sunday.  I could be pregnant.

I know the odds are against me, what with my history of not ever being pregnant and all.  But still… I’m letting myself hope.

For now.

As for tomorrow, we shall see what the morning brings.  At best, a positive pee-stick.  At worst, Aunt Flo and some Midol.

Either way, I see a giant breakfast with lots of salty breakfast meats and too much syrup in my near future.

We all deal with things differently, and I like to feed my feelings with bacon.

All of my feelings.

Mmm… celebratory bacon…

3 comments on “Hope…?

  1. Pregnantish
    June 26, 2011 at 8:25 am #

    Have everything crossed for you.


  2. Empty Whole
    June 27, 2011 at 2:44 pm #

    Just once I would love to be the “cliche pregnancy”, then I could be that friend of a friend’s cousin. Every time I get my period I like to think to myself, “it might not be a really period, maybe it’s just really heavy implementation bleeding” and “remember there’s a whole show about people who didn’t know they were pregnant, I could be on that show in 9 months”. And then I realize I’m smarter than that and I burst my own bubble.


    • Tracy
      June 29, 2011 at 8:29 am #

      I think we all fall victim to the “exception to the rule” mentality, when in fact, we really have pretty basic experiences each month. Well, basic for infertiles, I suppose.

      I just keep thinking that maybe I will be able to call the RE and tell her I will not actually be needing her services after all.

      And then I wake up from that dream and come screaming back to reality. 😛


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