Month: May 2011
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Busy Birds n’ Bees

May 23rd, 2011.  CD24.

It’s been a crazy couple of days around here, buzzing around trying to get ready for this trip out of town, frantically packing (and re-packing… (and then unpacking again because it’s too freaking early to pack)), and generally stressing out about things beyond my control.

Oh, and then the whole “trying to create life” thing too.  Yeah, it’s been busy day and night.

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Status

Long Time No Blog!

May 21st, 2011.  CD22.

Hiya folks!  It’s been a while, no?

I apologize for the lack of updates and snark, but I really haven’t had much to update, and my snark has been in the toilet lately.  I’m in a funk, and I really need a good slap in the face to break out of said funk.  I’m hoping that spending hours on the road and a few days in Knoxville, TN, will help with that!

The husband and I are gearing up for his brother’s wedding in just over a week.  We will be leaving a few days early, road-tripping it at our leisure, and staying in a nice hotel while we’re there.  I also have a couple of fancy dresses and shoes that promise to cripple my soon-to-be perfectly pedicured toes, so there’s also that to look forward to.

If spending copious amounts of money and getting all fancied up in my I’m-married-to-the-Best-Man finery doesn’t break me out of the funk and help me get my snark back, then I don’t know what will!

As for the whole baby-making thing, the story is very much the same as last month.  Today is CD22 and ovulation is (hopefully) just around the corner.  I haven’t been using OPK’s this month, and none of my other signs are very clearly indicating that an egg-drop is imminent.

Today’s plans include working, ingesting 2800 calories, relaxing with the husband, finding some time for the no-pants dance, and getting knocked up.  In that order.

So long as the world doesn’t end, anyway.

Have a happy Saturd–err, Judgement Day, friends, and watch out for raptors!

Vampires and angsty teens may be able to survive the Zombie Apocalypse, but no one can escape the Raptor!

Audio

Soundtrack Saturday :: It’s the End of the World As We Know It

I’m not even posting the lyrics to this one, I just posted it for fun.  Some rich quack out there has determined that today is when the world will end, so get thee to a bomb shelter folks!  The raptor cometh!

…Just remember, they can open door handles, but not door knobs.  Good luck and God speed!

Status

Skinny Bitch

May 12th, 2011.  CD13.

Hello friends!

Who wants some updates on my uterus?

Well too bad, because I don’t really have anything new to report.  CD13, big whoop.  If I were a textbook case, I’d be ovulating tomorrow.  Since I’m more of a headcase, I probably won’t ovulate until late next week or possibly later.

Oh well, that just gives me lots of time to “collect samples”, if ya know what I mean.  *winkwinknudgenudge*

So since my reproductive system is gathering dust, I’d like to take this opportunity to talk about another part of my body that isn’t working correctly:  My fat cells.

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Mothers Day Nursery Field Trip

May 8th, 2011.  CD9.

No, not that nursery.

The one across the street with the pretty flowers.

The husband and I took advantage of the warm, sunny day and took our poor dog for a nice long afternoon walk.  Our little jaunt took us over to the local nursery, where we picked up a basil plant and a couple of strawberry pots, and then over to the neighborhood frozen custard stand to secure a little after-dinner treat.

We spoke with the Moms on the phone, and made sure they received the silly cards we sent.  We did our duty by our own mothers, and after we grill a lovely steak dinner (with fresh basil couscous!), we’re going to get started on this month’s attempt at making me a mother.

What?  TMI?

Here’s some photos of some pretties to make it up to ya.

Enjoy.

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Mothers Day With Tina Fey

I know that as Infertiles, Mothers Day is supposed to make us bitter and resentful at the universe for our unending barrenness.

That sentiment seems a little selfish to me.  I mean, I may not have children (yet), but I do still have my mother, my mother-in-law, and my grandmother-in-law in my life.  This should be a day used to celebrate those that we still have with us, those women who brought us up.  Today should be the day to honor the women in our lives who have changed our diapers, yelled at us for crossing the street without looking both ways, stayed up all night waiting for us to sneak back into the house, and not telling Dad how late we got home or who it was that dropped us off.

For me, this is a day to honor them that I do have, not a day to cry about what I don’t.

Besides, I celebrate that every other day of the year…

And so, in honor of Mothers Day (and in honor of not taking yourself too seriously in life), I present to you an excerpt from the mind-blowingly awesome book I’m currently reading–Bossypants, by Tina Fey.

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Audio

Soundtrack Saturday :: Unwritten

This song has been sort of an empowerment theme for me for a few years.  At first, it was a song that really spoke to me when I was going through a nasty breakup and entering into a new, positive relationship–and really, a new, positive chapter of my life.  I was relieved to finally be rid of the past, and excited to move forward into the unknown.

Now that nasty breakups are a distant memory, and now that I’ve married that positive new chapter in my life, this song still speaks to me.  Today it’s a little more about how I won’t let my infertility define me.  How month after month can go by, and I will still keep vigilant that my BFP day will come.

My infertility book can’t end on a sad note… I’m more of a happy-ending kinda gal.

…You know what I mean.  Jeez.

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Video

Dammit, Pampers…

Have I mentioned that I’m not a crier?

Thanks a bunch, Pampers.  You broke my dry streak.

Status

A New Hope

May 4th, 2011.  CD5.

Today is Star Wars Day.

May the Fourth be with you… Get it?  May the Fourth?

Baaaaahahahahaha…

I’m endlessly amused by wordplay and silly puns and Star Wars in general, so this whole celebration has been right up my alley.

But hey, this blog is not about how much of a nerd I am, it’s about how infertile I am!  While both of those things are rather pitiful, let’s get back to the topic at hand, shall we?

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Status

May Day!

May 1st, 2011.  CD2.

I had Mountain Dew, Midol, and a bag of Baked Lays for dinner last night.  Went to bed way too late after watching hours of DVR-ed soaps.  Slept like absolute crap.  Awakened from a dim sleep by cramping which rendered me immobile.  Took more Midol.  Curled up in the fetal position, wide awake and in pain, catching up on Tweets on my phone for about an hour before I felt I could get out of bed.

Opened the bedroom door to find both cats staring at me.  Continued further into the house to find that they’d broken into the hall closet, somehow slicing open the bag of chicken jerky dog treats, and leaving a comically long trail of said treats throughout the house.  The dog was more amused by this than was I.

I didn’t even bother temping this morning because I was fairly certain the thermometer would beep and then say, “Whoa bitch, you’re a hot mess.”

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