I guess my post from yesterday riled a few people up, which was definitely not my intention. If you don’t care to read my defense of that post, and prefer to read an update on our infusion therapy treatments, feel free to skip down to the second section for that. :)
I meant no offense whatsoever with yesterday’s post, and was just expressing something I’ve noticed more and more of lately… There seems to be a little bit of a double standard when it comes to infertility and pregnancy, and while the majority of Infertiles are not included in this action, there is a lot of judgement out there on the interwebs.
Someone mentioned to me that as far as pregnancy complaints by Infertiles who have managed to conceive, that the audience makes a difference. I agree a thousand percent with that statement. There is no excuse for someone who’s been there in the trenches to bitch and moan to a group – or internet full – of people who would give anything to be in that position.
I was in no way defending that atrocious behavior, though the folks who do that are obviously a bit misguided in where to turn for support in their current situation, and could probably use a gentle nudge in the direction of their local Pregnancy After Infertility Support Group.
What I was trying to convey, while perhaps a little clumsily, was that I don’t think anyone, let alone our fellow Infertiles, has the right to shame a woman for expressing some of the negatives about her pregnancy. It’s easy enough to turn away from those statements if you’re not in a good place to hear them, but openly ridiculing someone for not enjoying every single aspect of what is a totally life- and body-changing event is a bit much.
This has not happened to me, mind you – well, that I know of, at least – but I’ve seen it, and it makes me upset. Hell, I’ve probably done it at some point in the past myself!
We’re all human, and no matter our path to get to this point, pregnancy is hard. There are even harder things to deal with than nausea, swelling, pain, and the gross things that come out of your body on the daily, too. Hyperemesis, preeclampsia, pregnancy complications, and pregnancy depression are all very real concerns that our fellow Infertiles sometimes go on to face after a long battle to get their miracle baby. Don’t even get me started on the terrors that await a new mother, fertile OR infertile…
Life’s not fair, but as people, we can be compassionate and show a little grace and understanding toward everyone… our fellow pregnant Infertiles – who will always be our sisters – included.
So that’s all I wanted to say… Just a bit of a wrap-up from yesterday. Agree or disagree, I meant no one any offense, nor did I mean that as an Infertile you are required to listen to pregnancy-bitching from anyone. You do what you need to do – I know I have turned away from some of it in the past. It’s a natural response.
And to you pregnant folks out there struggling to make the transition from Infertile with a whole internet of support, to mom-to-be with fears and concerns and complaints with insecurities in who to confide in… You do what you need to, as well. There are people to listen and support you.
The entire internet might not be a friendly place, but there are PLENTY of friendly faces within the IF community, and outside of it. I promise to be one of them.
And now the infusion therapy update that I know a few of you have been waiting for…
After a bit of an insurance snafu (read: the hospital scheduled me faster than the insurance company could grant clearance for the treatment, resulting in a scheduled appointment for Thursday, a cancelled appointment for Thursday, a night of panic that insurance was changing their mind on covering the treatment, and an appointment reschedule for Friday morning…), everything worked out just perfectly.
We arrived on Friday morning at 8am at the hospital’s infusion center for check-in.
I was shown to a big comfy recliner, and introduced my nurse and medical assistant. They brought me a drink and asked me if I wanted any snacks… I liked them immediately. :)
From there it was all rather uneventful. The infusion center’s pharmacy prepared my treatment, which came in four small bottles instead of one large bag like you typically see hanging from an IV pole. The nurse got my IV started, which barely hurt, and the medical assistant helped me recline my chair and got me some warm blankets and a pillow so I could relax and browse things on the internet while I waited.
Once the infusion started, it was about four full hours of internet browsing, snacking, dozing in my chair, and chatting with the husband – who at one point brought me some delicious breakfast from Panera.
It was seriously no big deal.
We were released when it was all over, and I was told I shouldn’t expect any side-effects aside from a little irritation at the IV site, which was more from the tape being torn off than the needle. My arm didn’t bruise or anything. Seriously, no complaints whatsoever.
This is the best I’ve felt about our situation since finding out that I tested positive for CMV. I know that between the infusion therapy and the daily antivirals, we are doing everything possible for our little lady to ensure that she is born healthy and has a happy life.
It’s up to her immune system now… And from what we’ve seen of her recently, this gal is a little fighter.
I’m confident that this treatment will make a difference, and I’m so, SO thankful that all the pieces fell into place so quickly for us. We started treating this much later than most people do because of the point at which we discovered the infection, but studies show that even one treatment can facilitate big improvements. We’re hoping to make it to three treatments before she’s born… as long as she’s not so much of a fighter that she decides to fight her way out too early.
Thank you to everyone for the thoughts, prayers, good juju, and positive vibes… Your support means the world to this little family, and I know that I wouldn’t be here, nor would my sanity, without it, and without all of YOU.